Is That All?

One of the most challenging tasks that many of us face is to convey an abstract or non-physical concept to another.  It can be difficult to have someone understand something that is not easily seen, or touched, and has no odor or sound.  An idea that does not fit into a person’s  “norm” of life can test the creativity of one who is trying to have another person understand.

One of the foundations of this blog series has been build on the concept of listening hospitality with the belief that truly listening to another person is a rare, but very valuable gift.  Yet with so many people who see listening as basically not talking, it can be difficult to convey the unique value of caring and loving listening.

 One of my recent projects has been to establish, organize and maintain a Listening Post in the county where I live.  The foundation of the Listening Post is to offer listening hospitality in a safe and confidential environment without any advice giving, judging, preaching, problem solving, or counseling.

While sharing the vision of this program possibility with a friend of many years, his reaction to offering the gift of listening in a program format was: “Is that all?”  It took some dialogue for him to see that people can need to give and receive listening without the exchange of monetary currency.

If you were to talk to a hair stylist, bartender, barber, sales person or almost anyone who deals with the public, you will learn that much of their daily job duties involve listening to other people, regardless of whether it is part of their official job description.

If you attend a social gathering like a party or an organization like a church, you soon realize that the leaders and the ones who are liked the most are the ones who are skilled in listening to others.  They are at the center of any sub-groups because people like being with them.

Several years back there was a movie called “Oh, God” with George Burns and John Denver.  In the last scene of the movie Denver’s character asks God (Burn’s character), if we “could talk together sometime” as he had enjoyed and learned so much from their conversations.  God responds with the true essence of prayer by saying: “You talk, I’ll listen”.

Carrying that same thought a bit further, one can see that one of the major values of having a prayer life is that one gets to talk about anything they wish.  There are no proper or forbidden topics.  One can be open about whatever is in their head and heart. 

There is no time limit or interruption from any heavenly deity.  As one old song goes “there is no busy signal on the hotline to God”.   Many people are often amazed that they get “answers” to their prayers by learning to listen to what they themselves are saying in prayer regardless of the format one chooses to use.

The Listening Post program is offering this same gift coming from a human being rather than a deity.  The volunteer is present for the people who need the concrete presence of a caring human to listen and respond. 

There will always be people who do not recognize the true difficulty of keeping their mouth closed (two eyes, two ears, and only one mouth to be used in this proportion).  Yes, we do live in a society that rewards talking, which makes a true and caring listener even more rare.

So, the next time someone says “Is that all?”, when you are offering the gift of listening hospitality without any prerequisites, you can remind yourself what a loving and powerful gift you are truly giving even when many do not understand the concept.

Comments welcome.   Email:  silverchatline@gmail.com