Journey Into Self

When asked the simple question “who are you?”, most people answer with labels that they have learned from others such as : parent, wife/husband, profession/skill, Georgian, Democrat, etc.


Much of what we know about ourselves comes from a script written by other people. Starting with our parents and other family members, followed by teachers, employers, friends, etc., we learn who we are by what others tell us.


Of all that we study during our lives, the study of self receives little attention. We accept what others tell us about who we are; we act out the script taking our lines from what our society writes.


Most of the time, this works out fine. The challenge comes when we ask that famous Dr. Phil counseling line “How is that behavior/attitude working out for you?” and we respond with something about it not doing a good job to solve our life problems.


For those persons who eventually become dissatisfied with the labels imposed on them so they can be ‘normal’ and accepted by the various worlds in which they live, they seek better understanding and appreciation of their unique humanness. They strive to learn and value how they are special creations.


As a retired psychologist, I have found two major approaches that worked well for many people: a self-directed study using techniques such as journaling and a personal retreat process with an objective companion.


A personal journal is built along the same unique methodology as developing a close friendship; we develop a process that works for us. There is no right or wrong way. “To thy own self be true” is the goal of our journaling process.


A journal is not a diary. It is not a recording of daily events like a calendar. It is our own personal creation that focuses on the creation of styles that challenge and encourage us to focus on our inner thoughts, beliefs, values, feelings, etc. It needs to be deeply honest and intimate to have maximum value. Unfortunately, being either is a process that most of us have not had the privilege of learning, since our society encourages us to be ‘normal’ and similar to other people around us.


Understanding the limitations of self-study through journaling, some individuals seek out a personal retreat process. The major criterion for effectiveness is to have a companion who can be objective and caring about your uniqueness as a human and someone with whom you can be open, honest and vulnerable.


This companion will assist you to minimize the distractions of your world, usually in a remote setting. He/she is not part of your usual environment so they have the objectivity needed for the challenges of self-study.


This journey into self-study is a personal treasure that is difficult and yet priceless for our life enrichment.


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